A New Journey

Yesterday began a new journey for me, one I do not want to take, will not enjoy at all, and it may end in tragedy. My co-worker, Sheila, found out she has cancer and it's not good. Not that any cancer is good, but some are admittedly better that others. This is not good. My first thought was to pray with her, but I couldn't. I really couldn't, tears would have been all I would have to offer up. So I called Terrel, my wonderful minister and friend. He came immediately and prayed for us. This is such a hard time of the year to learn you have cancer. Christmas is to be such a happy time. This just reminds me that many people find Christmas to be hurtful and I should realize that not every one is joyous.

My business will be full blast in less than a month and Sheila carries a vital role in that business. My journey of helping Sheila through this will not be easy, however I hope the one thing she learns from me that it is her journey and not the outcome that is important. I hope she learns that in our journey that Christ is reflected.

I pray Dear Lord, help me to be the employer that I must be to reflect Christ.

Cookie

I met Cookie about 3 years ago and boy did she have the baggage. I didn't know if I really could handle her friendship or not. You know some friends just demand too much. You see Cookie had just come out of a very abusive relationship and she looked at me as her salvation. But I'm no Saviour!!! Oh, yes I do try to imitate the Saviour, but to actually be the Saviour, I don't know. Well we decided to take it slow, first she needed to learn to trust again. You know once the people you love abuse you it's hard to trust again. Cookie still could function on her day to day activities, it was actual relationships which were damaged. The question lingering in my mind, my heart , my time , my being, was do I want to commit that much to one? Oh, I'm committed that much to my husband, my children, my family, but Cookie is no relation to me. She is optional. Like I said, we decided to take it slow and it has been slow, in fact even today our relationship is still not normal, but it is coming along. She is becoming more trustworthy of me and even Kevin too, ( which I know is especially difficult for her). Today she will spend time in one on one interaction for a short period of time and actually enjoy it. But then she has had enough and off she goes. This relationship is all on her time table and that's OK with me. I think one of the best times was when we had the Small Group over from church and Cookie showed up. She really surprised me by interacting with the small group and seemed to actually enjoy her short time she spent with us. But alas she again had to run! Cookie is teaching me patience, perseverance, and joy in the small accomplishments. Not everyone is as I think they should be, they each have their own baggage and I have to go along on their timetable. Even if their timetable is much slower than what I would like. Sometimes the beauty of the relationship is the time it takes getting there. You know my relationship with God is the same way and I'm forever thankful to Cookie and God for teaching me these things.

Blessed

Family has always been important to me and my family. I really attribute that to my maternal grandmother, Nell. Grandma died of heart problems and breast cancer in 1986. If anyone in the family was having a problem then Grandma had a dinner and had all the family come together.
We had dinners for my uncle going into a mental institution, another uncle going off to war in the early 70's, divorces, separations, deaths, new boyfriends, marriages, pregnancies, remarriages, graduations, holidays, Sundays, Saturdays, Birthdays, Anniversaries, Folks coming in from Florida, and then they were handed down to My uncle and MY Mom, and now they are handed down to My generation.

My generation which will carry on the Family Dinner consist of 3 girls, 15 months apart in age, and close enough to be all sisters. Our mothers used to laugh that whenever we got together we couldn't help but giggle all the time. We still do!!! We love being together, We just don't do it enough. Well that has got to change, our children are now all grown, and we really have no excuses any longer.

Well Grandma we need another dinner, my cousin Karen, who just lost her Mother to Breast Cancer in March, has now gotten the dreaded word that she too has BC.



We are blessed to have the family that supports one another, loves one another and is ready with a dinner for one another.

How more blessed can you be?

Poem

Living in the present moment is the secret of joy. Is that so difficult to understand? I don’t think so, for Jason Lehman was only fourteen when he wrote the following poem.

It was Spring, but it was Summer I wanted:The warm days and the great outdoors.
It was Summer, but it was Fall I wanted:The colorful leaves and the cool, dry air.
It was Fall, but it was Winter I wanted:The beautiful snow and the joy of the holiday season.
It was Winter, but it was Spring I wanted:The warmth and the blossoming of nature.
I was a child, and it was adulthood I wanted:The freedom and the respect.
I was 20, but it was 30 I wanted:To be mature and sophisticated.
I was middle-aged, but it was 20 I wanted:The youth and the free spirit.
I was retired, but it was middle-aged I wanted:The presence of mind without limitations.
My life was over,and I never got what I wanted.

After The Storm

Tax Season is OVER

So glad to be done with income taxes, although I do have some extensions to do, for the most part I am finished.

I am totally exhausted and can do nothing but sleep, it is a wonder how the body will work on pure adrenalin until it is not needed any longer and then collapse. Are not we wonderfully made?

Have some thoughts for later, but now gotta rest.

Ice Storm

Well who knew? I have power, heat and internet. I have no cable TV however. Everyone around me is without power except for the rest home next door. I think it must be a blessing to live next door to a rest home. We've always said that when we got old all the kids had to do was put us over the fence and we would be taken care of. But the other good thing is that we must be on the same power grid as the rest home. I think they must be a priority or something because many a time we have power when many others around us do not. But with the falling of limbs that I hear outside that could change any minute.

I got out today with Samantha and we tried the trek to the office. Well that was a trip in and of itself. We started out and the roads really were not all that bad, the County has done a wonderful job preparing for the icy conditions. However limbs crossing the highways and power lines down did cause altered directions. We finally got to the office in a round about way, but we were there and the power was on, and you know what, the phone was ringing off the wall. We did some important matters that really needed to be taken care of and then told who ever called we would be leaving early. We also put the phone system on Inclement weather mode. I wish I could figure out a way to do that from home. I bet there is a way but I just have to learn.

Everything here is fine, hubby has gone to work and hopefully will come in tonight, that is if his relief comes in tonight. If not then I guess the morning will bring him home.

My aunt who lives in the high rise here in town called to say that they were without power and everywhere she could see out her 18th floor apartment was dark. So looks like the whole town pretty much is powerless. She is fine, having a slumber party with some of her girlfriends.

Well I made it through this post and no loss. Guess I'm doing good. I hope all of you get your power on quickly and stay warm.

Till later.

Surrender

My church theme this year is Surrender and all of our care group lessons so far this year have been on this subject. Surrender is really a hard subject to explain and understand because it is multifaceted. On one hand I think I've got it and on the other hand I'm nowhere close to surrendering.

I trust God in everything that happens in my life, I know that he is in control and that with his guidance all is well. Everything will out to his Glory. I don't worry about things because I know God is in control, I think I've got the worrying part down, but then I wonder am I kidding myself?

Right now I feel there is something he is preparing me to do but I just don't know what it is at this time. I think not knowing is part of his training me to wait upon Him. I like to know things and he knows it. God keeps me in the dark to further my dependence on HIM. I also have to learn to listen for his direction. He speaks to me but ever so softly. I find it hard to just sit and listen for God. Prayer is not only me petitioning God but should also involve the listening aspect and I think so often we do not emphasise the listening.

I plan on listening more to God and look for the many ways he speaks to me. It is uncanny how often he nudges me during the day.

Till later - Careful listening.

Recycle and electronics

Well I did it, Kevin and I took off all of the electronics that I kept hanging on to. We took it to the electronics recycle day. There were 2 monitors, 2 printers, cordless phone system with 7 handsets, 2 scanners, 1 computer and no telling what else. Oh by the way the computer was not mine, it was Mom's personal computer. I would have to take my hard drive out and have it professionally shredded (privacy laws).
I still held onto a scanner hoping that I can find someone to fix it for a lot less than I can buy a new one. I don't think there is much wrong with it but it cost so much for someone to even look at it to find out.
I wish my computer geek son lived closer, that's what happens to kids, you send them off to get an education which you know will be useful to you and what do they do? Move off!!! Sent son to be electronics geek, knowing I would need his expertise in my business and all I got was a $30,000 networking job. With that kind of money you would expect lifetime warranty at no charge, right? No as soon as it is all done and the warranty is to begin, he moves 3+ hours away. That is the way warranties are!

Getting Started

Why am I sitting here doing this? I have been a lurker long enough. Finally decided to give it a try, blogging that is. We will see how long it is until my next post. I should be in bed now but here I sit. It seem like I can't sleep like I used to, is it my age? I know my Mom always said wait till you get older and you won't be able to sleep either. Well thanks Mom, I guess it is coming. Although in the mornings I have no trouble sleeping at all. It's just at night. Maybe I am reverting back to childhood, babyhood, I'll have to ask Mom at what age I started sleeping through the night, I hope that doesn't indicate how many days I have left on this earth.
Maybe if I write long enough I will get sleepy, You think? I know my Italian Greyhound Vito wants me to go to bed, I can always tell, he gets antsy, it's like he doesn't want me up too late, like he's got some big date and doesn't want any interference. OK, Vito, I'm going to bed, are you happy now, you can let the date in now,
Well see ya later and hope I sleep tonight.